


The G-Team's Jungle

by riacte



Series: Wholesome Hermitcraft [1]
Category: Hermitcraft RPF, Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Fluff, Gen, jungle squad, the hermits being silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:15:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23150803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riacte/pseuds/riacte
Summary: Update: NOW WITH REN!!-Grian decides to organize a meeting with his jungle neighbours. During that, they realize a) Grian really likes to kill parrots b) most of them were G-Team members and c) Iskall is notoriously bad at naming things.They also realize they want a name for their jungle.(Set in Season 7, a short fluffy piece)
Series: Wholesome Hermitcraft [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1736713
Comments: 30
Kudos: 317





	1. Chapter 1

“Dear hermits, thank you all for coming here today,” Grian announced in a faux posh voice. He clapped his hands and looked expectantly at his jungle neighbours. His expression was unusually serious- but everyone knew it was an act. Nevertheless, they played along with him.

“Good to see you, Mr. Jungler.” Scar nodded his head politely, biting his lip to suppress his laughter. Grian’s mouth fell open in protest.

“You- you must be mistaken, Mr. GoodTimes!” Grian exclaimed dramatically. “I’m not this Jungler you speak of!” Grian then paced and stared off into the distance, as if searching for something. He stood on his tiptoes, squinting at the leafy trees.

“Aha, the Jungler must be those pesky birds! What a good thing that I’ve hunted them down!”

“So _that’s_ why I can’t find any parrot,” Mumbo muttered, glaring at his neighbour. “Grian, you’ve killed them all!”

“By the way, it’s good to see you on time, Mumbo,” Grian continued smoothly as if Mumbo had never said anything. “You had quite the reputation back at Sahara.” The mischievous glint in Grian’s eyes was obvious. Stress chortled. Mumbo spluttered. 

“At least I didn’t put a potato in the-”

“Alright, you two, stop bantering,” Iskall interrupted. He looked half-exasperated, half-amused, and the others knew he was tired because he’d just finished transporting his villagers. Mumbo and Grian immediately shut up, not wanting to bother Iskall further when he was so exhausted. “Let’s get on with this meeting.”

Grian performed a small bow. “As you wish. So anyways, I’m sure you all realize we live in the same jungle.”

Stress stared at him, big brown eyes wide. “We possibly can’t be running out of space already-”

Grian chuckled. “No, no, it’s not that! I’m just thinking that there’s another jungle out there, y’know, with Ex-eye-zoom-ma-void and Etho, and I think we need a name for this jungle. _Our_ jungle.”

Stress brightened up at the idea. “Alright, that seems sweet! Maybe we can call it the ‘Jungle of Gorgeousness’ or ooh!” Stress nudged Iskall in the ribs and laughed. “‘The Jungle of Doom’!”

“Well. Umm.” Scar stroked his abnormally long beard. “Maybe ‘Parrot Paradise’-”

His suggestion was met with several groans from the others. “This is literally anything other than a parrot paradise!” Mumbo exclaimed, making sure to send Grian a very noticeable, not-at-all subtle glare. “‘Parrot Hell’ would be a better choice,” Mumbo snorted.

Grian smiled cheekily at Mumbo, then swiftly returned to the conversation. “I was thinking of something hobbit related, but not everyone has a hobbit hole for their bases. But I think we’re all doing something vaguely fantasy this season?”

“Oooh! Maybe ‘Fantasy Forest’ or something?” Stress piped in, eyes glimmering with excitement. “Or is that too cliché?”

As the hermits talked among themselves and threw out name suggestions, Iskall groaned. “This is becoming like the G-Team situation. You know, when we had to come up with a name.”

Mumbo looked around and jumped, as if he’d just remembered something. “Oh yeah! Most of us are G-Team members!” 

The hermits shared glances, and realized Mumbo was right. Scar, knowing he was the odd one out, shrugged and drawled, “ _Weeell,_ I guess I’ll exclude myself from this narrative-”

“Scar, it’s fine! It’s not like you were part of Team S.T.A.R!” Iskall thumped Scar on the back. “You can be an honorary G-Team member.” 

“Wait, guys, that’s it!” Grian shouted, shocking everyone. “This is the G-Team Jungle! The-the _Gungle._ ”

After Grian’s bold proclamation, the area fell silent. The hermits stared at Grian, stunned. Then-

“Oh my word Gri, I don’t want to hear that ever again.” Mumbo sighed and burrowed his face in his arms. 

“Mumbo has been nothing but annoying, but yeah, I’ll have to agree with him on this one,” Iskall said.

“Wait, Mumbo’s been _annoying_?” Stress asked incredulously. Apparently she’d hit a sore spot, because Iskall immediately huffed. 

“He gave me twelve bamboo for a stack of bones,” Iskall deadpanned. “ _Twelve bamboo!_ ” 

Grian waved his (admittedly short) arms to gain the others' attention. “Listen, guys, the Gungle is a great name,” Grian tried to convince his friends. “Like, our names all have the letter G in them!”

“Here we go again,” Iskall and Stress murmured in unison. Mumbo, who was not present at the G-Team’s naming, blinked curiously at them.

Grian pointed to himself, grinning widely. “Grian.” Then he gestured to Scar, and continued, “GoodTimesWithScar. See, it’s all coming together nicely!”

“And we have…” Grian’s eyes scanned the other hermits, and a bubble of laughter escaped from his lips. “Umm, _Isgall85_ and _GressMonster101_. Yep, this is totally working out! A-and we even have _Mumbo Gumbo!_ ”

“Geez, we just need Geexuma and Geralis,” Mumbo said sarcastically. “And Galse. Gdubs. GFC-”

Before Mumbo could say more ridiculous “G” versions of the hermits, everyone burst into peals of laughter.

"The GUNGLE!" Scar choked out, clutching his sides as he laughed. "What the heck?"

"I'll admit it's funny, but it's a terrible name," Iskall got out in between his hearty chuckles. 

Grian's eyes narrowed and the corners of his lips quirked up. "Oh, and do you have better names, Mr. I-literally-named-a-pillager-' _hello'_ ?" he snarked. 

Iskall stared at Grian for a long time, fighting a grin that was twitching on his face. Grian looked back at him innocently, batting his eyelashes. 

"Fine. _Fine,_ Grian, you win."

Stress was giggling hysterically. “The Gungle… oh dear…”

Scar was hopping around, majestic purple cape flapping behind him. “ _In the Gungle, the mighty Gungle, the Gungler sleeps tonight!_ ” he sang cheerfully.

"Well, I guess that settles it!" Grian took out a few rockets, lit them, and sent them zooming straight up. They exploded, leaving colourful sparkles in the sky. _"Welcome to the Gungle!"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first Hermitcraft fanfic, so it's going to be a little awkward. If you get the feeling that Grian is dominating this fic, that's completely intentional. Maybe it's because I started by watching Grian, but I always feel like he's... very assertive, even in other hermits' videos. So I tried to imitate that.
> 
> Thanks for reading whatever-this-is. It's something purely chaotic that I came up at 11pm :D


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... I found this lying in my HC WIP folder. From June 1 2020. I know Ren has joined the Jungle for like five months but I just randomly rediscovered this and had to finish it. Hope you enjoy the addition of Ren! I was honestly very hyped because the main hermits I watch are all living in the same area. Before Ren joined I would often think about how nice it was that Architechs, Scar and Stress were all in the Jungle... never thought Ren would join as well, haha.

To properly welcome Ren into the Jungle-Mesa Area, the other residents threw a little party. Mumbo took with him a batch of cookies (he insisted they had _nothing_ to do with the infamous Hermit Challenges), Stress baked some cupcakes, while Scar got milkshakes for everybody. Iskall plopped down a jukebox and inserted a music disc. The parrots (“pesky birds”) Grian had brought along started to dance and bop their heads to the music. Everyone was having a good time.

Iskall heartedly slapped Ren’s back. “Sorry to hear about your old base, dude.”

“Yeah,” Scar chimed in. “It went boom boom, didn’t it?”

“Yeah, R.I.P to Loser Island! Besides, it was my fault that it blew up… and my fault that I lost my beloved bovine Pamela.” Dejected, Ren stared at the ground and sighed, but then he looked up with a smile. “But well, at least I can start on a new base now!”

“And you have us here!” Stress grinned at him. 

“You’re officially in the exclusive Jungle Gang!” Iskall exclaimed.

“Wait, wait, wait.” Grian, who had been vibing with the parrots, suddenly entered the conversation. “Iskall, we’re the Gungle Gang. I thought we established that earlier?”

  
Ren stared at Grian, extremely confused. “G, what on earth-“

“But Ren isn’t a G-Team member,” Mumbo said rapidly. “He-he never was a G-Team member.”

Ren glanced at Mumbo. “Dude, why are you bringing up the Civil War from last season?”

“Because we’re all G-Team members here,” Mumbo pointed out. “Well, at least, except for you.”

“Urm.” Ren shot Scar a look, who somehow looked as confused as he was. “Scar wasn’t in the G-Team-“

Stress said “he’s an exception!” just as Grian said “he’s an outsider and should not be counted”. Ren tried to ignore their seemingly contradictory comments, and watched as Scar spluttered out his protests.

“All jokes aside, we can actually accept Ren in the Gungle!” Grian announced. “Because-“

Everyone else groaned loudly, knowing what he was about to say.

“Grian, stop,” Mumbo deadpanned.

“-Rendo **G**! He has a G in his name!” Grian cheered.

For a moment, nothing could be heard except for the chirp of a parrot.

“... _That’s_ it?” Ren wasn’t really impressed. “That’s why you ‘accept’ me, G?”

Grian waved his hands. “I mean, this place isn’t called the Gungle for nothing!”

Ren stared at his friends, the gears in his brain turning slowly. “Well, err, thanks?” He managed to get out.

Iskall patted his shoulder. “Don’t mind Grian, he’s being annoying as always.”

“Totally agree,” Mumbo chimed in. “Enjoy your time here. You’re probably a little safer from Grian’s antics since you live in the Mesa.”

Grian naturally had to butt in. “Hey, don’t talk like I’m not here!” He protested.

“G-Grian, what did you mean when you said ‘ _I’m an outsider and should not be counted_ ’?” Scar wailed, joining in the conversation. 

The four men started to bicker and Ren could just gape and stare. He had no idea what he should do. Upon seeing this sight, an exasperated Stress clucked her tongue and placed a comforting hand on Ren.

“Don’t mind the boys! They fight every three days,” Stress said in an almost motherly tone. “Let’s go, Ren. I’ll help you get settled in.”


End file.
